The Yoni Massage

Yoni: pronounced yo-nee, is a Sanskrit word for the vagina, loosely translated as 'sacred space' or 'sacred temple'. It offers an alternate meaning from the western view of female genitals (eg. pussy, cunt etc, of a more vulgar sense). In Tantra the Yoni is seen from a perspective of love and respect. This is especially helpful for men to learn.

The purpose of the Yoni massage is to create a space for the woman (the receiver) to relax, and enter a state of high arousal and experience much pleasure from her Yoni. Her partner (the giver) experiences the joy of being of service and witnessing a special moment. The massage can also be used as a form of safe sex (when latex gloves are worn). Some massage and sex therapists use it to assist women to break through sexual blocks or trauma.

The goal of the massage is not orgasm, although it is often a pleasant side effect. The goal is simply to give pleasure to the Yoni. The purpose being to relax and to forget pressures to achieve orgasm.

Preparation

Bathing is always helpful as it relaxes both receiver and giver, a quiet space is desirable with pleasant music, candles, pillows etc.; whatever makes you relax and feel safe. Do not hurry the process. Connect with your partner by hugging, holding and eye glazing (looking into each other's eyes for extended periods). Whatever makes you relax and feel safe.

Procedure

Have the receiver lie on her back with pillows under her head so she can look down at her genitals and up at her partner (giver). Place a pillow, covered with a towel preferably, under her hips. Her legs should be spread apart with knees slightly bent; her genitals exposed for the massage.

The giver sits cross-legged between the receiver's legs, allowing full access to the Yoni.

Before contact, begin with deep relaxing breathing. Both should remember to keep breathing deeply throughout. If the receiver should stop deep breathing the giver should remind her to continue.

Pour a small quantity of lubricant on the mound of the Yoni. Spend some time there and don't rush. Pour just enough oil/whatever so that it drips down the outer lips and covers the outside of the Yoni.

Begin gently massaging the mound and outer lips of the Yoni. Spend some time here and do not rush. Relax and enjoy the experience. Gently squeeze the outer lip between thumb and index finger, slide up and down the entire length of each lip, and likewise to each inner lip.

The receiver can massage her own breasts or may just relax and continue breathing deeply. Eye contact between giver and receiver is important, and it will allow the giver to gauge pressure. The receiver may tell the giver to increase the speed or depth of the massage, but communication should be restricted in order not to detract from the sensations of the massage.

Gently stroke the clitoris with a clockwise, counter clockwise motion. Gently squeeze it between thumb and index fingers. Do this as a massage and not to induce orgasm. The receiver will become aroused, however encourage her to just relax and continue breathing deeply.

Slowly and with great care insert the middle finger of your right hand into the Yoni (the right as opposed to the left due to reasons of polarity in Tantra). Very gently explore and massage the inside of the Yoni with this finger. As always, be gentle and take your time. Feel up and down, sideways; vary depth, speed and pressure: this is a massage and you are nurturing and relaxing the Yoni.

With the palm facing up an the middle finger inside the Yoni, crook the finger (as if you were gesturing for someone to "come here") towards the palm of your hand. You will encounter a spongy area of tissue under the pubic bone, behind the clitoris (the G-spot (Grafenberg) or in Tantra the sacred spot). Your partner may feel the urge to urinate or it may be painful or pleasurable. Again, vary pressure, speed and pattern of the massage (side to side, back and forth, circles etc.). You may even insert another finger providing your partner is willing. You may use the thumb of the right hand to stimulate the clitoris as well.

The left hand, meanwhile, is free to massage the receiver's breasts, abdomen and clitoris. If you massage the clitoris it is best done using the thumb in an up and down motion, with the rest of your hand resting on and massaging the mound. The dual stimulation of your right and left hands will provide a great deal of pleasure for the receiver. Remember that the pleasure is for the receiver, hence the giver should refrain from touching his/her own genitals, plus it is important to concentrate on the receiver, physically as well as mentally.

Continue the massage, trying different speeds etc. keep breathing and maintain eye contact as much as possible. The receiver may have powerful emotions well up and she may cry. Just keep breathing and be gentle. Women who have been sexually abused can benefit a great deal from a loving, giving partner.

If she should have an orgasm, keep her breathing and continue massaging if she wants you to. More orgasms may arise, each gaining in intensity. In Tantra this is known as riding the wave. Many women can learn how to be multi-orgasmic with the Yoni massage and a patient partner.

Keep massaging until she tells you to stop. Very slowly, gently, and with respect, remove your hands from her body. Allow her to just lay there and enjoy the afterglow of the Yoni massage. Cuddling or holding is very soothing as well. Stay close to her, hug her and be very gentle as she comes down from what should be an intense experience.

As you learn to master the Yoni massage your sex life will be greatly enriched and you will learn a great deal about feminine sexuality.

There is a similar massage for men called the Lingam massage. Lingam is a Sanskrit word for the penis meaning "Wand of Light".

These texts are copyright 1993-2001 by Jeffery Tye, and are officially on the Church of Tantra web site.